WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO COMPETE?
The willingness to compete is an important but challenging responsibility anyone who wants to become a champion is required to accept. In this highly competitive world, we spend a lot of time talking about competing, encouraging the important people in our lives to do it, and trying to figure out its place in the midst of our own pursuit. But what exactly does it mean to compete? What does it look like, and why is it so important? And how can we continue to develop this ability for ourselves, and use it to become more worthy of winning in the areas that matter most?
The word “compete” comes from the Latin word competere, which means “to strive together.” That original definition speaks to a somewhat romantic and what feels in many ways like an unrealistic idea when you consider what competition looks like in today’s cutthroat culture. We typically define competing today with a sense of ruthlessness around really wanting to win or really hating to lose. But it feels like doing that - focusing solely on the winning or losing outcome as the sole driver of our competitiveness - has in some ways distorted the word’s original meaning, and in doing so has brought an unhealthy element to what is supposed to be a fun and empowering experience.
I’m no romantic, and I have no illusion of or even desire to create a world for myself or for you here today where a commitment to competing is detached from the outcome. That’s because in the real world, results matter. We live in a world that keeps score, and there’s value in cultivating a desire to win and a disdain for losing. But for me personally, there’s also value in reconnecting with the word’s original meaning, and shifting at least a little of my attention away from the outcome-only focus that's prevalent today. Finding that balance isn't easy, but it makes the idea of competition more fun and more empowering for me.
I want to challenge and encourage you today to find a little balance for yourself, and consider how a different approach to competing might benefit you in the important areas of life and performance. Making that commitment starts with asking a couple important questions…
Question #1: What am I striving for? If competing is about striving together, then there’s value in clarifying what exactly it is we’re after. Competing as we define it today is mostly focused on pursuing success. We all want to be successful, but success is outcome-focused, and typically centered on superiority over someone else. Competing's original meaning seemed to focus more on chasing excellence. A standard of excellence diminishes the role others play in your pursuit, and focuses instead on the process of becoming the very best you can be. When you stop and think about it, that really constitutes the ultimate striving, doesn’t it? Pushing, stretching, and challenging yourself to the very limit of your own capabilities, regardless of the outcome and in spite of anyone else? Excellence is actually the higher and more challenging standard to meet.
Question #2: Who am I striving with? If competing is about striving together, but the pursuit of excellence diminishes the role others play in this pursuit, then who are you striving with? When you choose to chase excellence, it's that best version of yourself that you're after. I believe that for most of us, our biggest challenge and our toughest opponent is usually the person looking back at us in the mirror. More often than we'd like to admit, no one else has to beat us. We take care of that ourselves. So while it's easy in competition to focus our attention on our opponent, we're probably better off focusing on ourselves. Pursuing our very best starts by clarifying what exactly that looks like. So what qualities and characteristics does you at your best possess? What behaviors does that version of you exhibit, and what choices do they make? If you’re anything like me, pushing and stretching and challenging yourself to meet that standard will keep you plenty busy.
The commitment to chasing excellence isn’t easy, but it is important because it validates a deeper understanding of what it really means to compete. It's the best formula for reaching your potential, and ironically as a by-product, it puts you in the best position to get the winning outcome you say you’re after. Really, truly competing moves you beyond just saying that you want to win or that you hate to lose, and into the unique category of people who are willing to do the hard work it takes to prove it.